First off, go over to The City Life, to read a hilarious tale featuring a crazy woman, and her vagina.

And no, it's not about me.

For the rest of this post, I think I'll jump around a bit. There were a few stories/observations I meant to talk about earlier, but kept forgetting about. Most of the stories do have something in common. My mom. We're pretty close, and talk on a regular basis. I love her, although there is no one on this planet that can drive me mad and upset me like she can. Anyway, this isn't about that. In the last little while, it seems I've been discovering things that I never knew - about her, about me, about everything.

My mother comes from a large family. Her youngest brother lived with us when we were growing up for a short period of time, then got married, adopted his step-daughter, and moved to various apartments always a short walk from our house. His wife and my mother often worked together, and I would often see them sitting at the kitchen table, smoking DuMaurier Extra Light King Size cigarettes, and drinking instant coffee, after I got home from school. His wife was, to me, the epitome of a soap opera heroine. She had jet black hair, long, pointy red fingernails, a skinny build, and a very expressive demeanor. She was dramatic, and wore lots of jewelry. She'd tap-tap-tap those fingernails when she'd talk to underscore a point she was making. She was very different from my mom.

She had a daughter. She was a few years older than me, and I thought she was 'cool'. She could be a bitch sometimes, but often times she'd be stuck having to play with me when the adults were busy smoking their cigarettes and drinking their instant coffee. I remember our 'play sessions' vividly. As I got older, I realized that what we were doing was probably not appropriate for a 8 year old and a 12 year old. I've put it out of my mind, though, and it's not an issue for me anymore.

Anyway, that isn't really what this post is about. About two weeks ago, my mother and I were talking about her family, and the subject of her youngest brother came up. I don't remember why I said this, but I said something to the effect of... "he was really fun, and you could tell he really loved kids, but he was a little.... a little too affectionate". He was. Growing up, he was one of my favorite uncles, because he would play with us, and give us lots of attention. However, now and again, his playing would just get too physical and, well, annoying. Having said this to my mother, I expected her to be surprised, or to even defend him (despite the fact that they had a falling out soon after my grandmother passed away). To my surprise though, she said "yes, I know, we sometimes had to watch him with you girls". I was shocked to hear that after all these years, that sort of dynamic existed between the two families, yet I was oblivious to it.

Now that I know this, I must say I now wonder if there was any connection between his actions, and his stepdaughter's. Hm.

Woah. That was a bit more heavy than I intended. I was going to write more, but I must say that took a bit out of me to write, and what I wanted to write about isn't much of a pick-me-up, either. I promise to post more later on today, though. If you want to cheer yourself up in the meantime, I recommend taking another gander at the boys down below.